ANXIETY MORNING AND NIGHT
Before coming to Carole, I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety. I had been in the hospital two times for anxiety and suffered from severe anxiety attacks. I had been to therapists before and never felt any improvements in myself, until I met Carole. I use to never know where my anxiety stemmed from. I would wake up in the morning with my anxiety and go to sleep with it. I use to have anxiety attacks when I couldn’t get my metro card out before I got to the subway. Everything was a ‘trigger’ for me. I learned what a ‘trigger’ was when I came to Carole. This was one of many methods she taught me to learn where my anxiety was stemming from. I truly believed that my anxiety had no reasoning behind it, I couldn’t figure out what would set me off.
Carole taught me to find the trigger of my anxiety. Right when I felt super-anxious, I would remove myself and write down exactly what happened right after it happened. Combining this with different breathing techniques Carole taught me, I was able to find out my "triggers" (what was causing my anxiety attacks). Now, I know when "something gets to me," I have tools to deal with it in the moment and how to follow up afterwards to change the situation. I started seeing Carole in 2017 and now in 2019 I can really say that I no longer have anxiety attacks, I rarely feel overwhelmed by my anxiety and most days I don’t feel anxiety at all. Her techniques have given me back my life and I feel that I can live again. –J.K
BEING REACTIVE HURT MY RELATIONSHIP
The one factor that lead me to seek therapy was how I reacted to things, specifically, sharing of household chores.Walking in the door from a fairly good day at work to blow up at my significant other for not helping out around the apartment (whether it was washing dishes, putting clothes away, etc) was not only failing at getting my point across, but it (me blowing up in anger) was not a person I liked.
Carole asked what triggered me. I recognized what my triggers were and when triggered deeply I excused myself and did the breathing exercise she suggested. The breathing exercise really did help calm me down. It was then that I wrote the trigger down in my book.
This technique has been successful in more than one way: 1st: It gives me time to calm down. Yelling and blowing up did not work. My point was not getting across, all the yelling was doing was causing more stress in our relationship. 2nd: The times I did excuse myself to breath, he knew something upset me and without me having to mention it, he helped with household chores.
I really appreciate this technique and will continue to use it. It gives me time to realize, the sky really isn't falling. :)
IMPULSE TO FIX THE SITUATION IN THE MOMENT
In using Carole's methodology of writing down triggers, I am amazed by how much more self-aware I have become and by the improvements I've made in being able to keep my emotions in check. Whereas in the past I would immediately act upon situations with emotion and feel that I needed to address things right away, I now find that I am ok to "table" discussing or reacting to a situation until a later or another day. In doing so, I have time to reassess any situation and most importantly to consider WHY I felt an emotional pull or reaction.
This is a methodology just about anyone can benefit from greatly. Using her tools made a big difference in my relationship. By being able to step back Instead of being easily upset, I gained credibility with my boyfriend, so when I did speak with him about an issue, he was receptive.